Logo Jerry Ham

Do you ever feel like asking, "Lord, why me? Why did you put me in this situation?" I have. That's not to say that I have regrets. I don't. We have done what we felt should be done and what was in my mother's best interest. When we returned from our week break this past Saturday evening, the lady who took care of mom in our absence told us that the day before, mom had had a TIA that lasted about 3-4 minutes and also put her on the bathroom floor. The rest of that day, mom was really wiped out. Also she said that a couple of times mom had gone into a fetal position while sitting in the chair. We noticed that mom could not or would not open her eyes for us that Saturday night on our arrival home. For the past three days now, mom has kept her eyes closed most of the time. I noticed that this morning during breakfast, mom appeared to have several TIAs, each one lasting for only a few seconds. It's so hard to know just exactly what is going on with her. But her mother suffered a massive stroke that left her in a coma and brain dead for a month before she actually died. Even at this time, we are well aware that we still have it much easier than some of you who are caring for your loved one at home. But in regards to my question at the beginning, if you have ever asked those kinds of things, this is for you.

Dear Lord, why me?

I'd like to ask a question Lord,
if it's OK with you.
It concerns the trials
and the challenges we go through.
Now Lord, please understand,
cause I don't mean to whine,
But I can't keep these thoughts
from running circles in my mind.
Now Lord, I am aware,
that You have a master plan,
And Lord, I also know
that I am just a mortal man.
Your ways are not my ways,
I know that all too well.
Your thoughts are not my thoughts,
that much I can tell.
Yes dear Lord I know,
that indeed Your love is true,
And You will help us do
all the things we need to do.
Lord, it's really hard sometimes,
to see how much I've grown,
I really didn't come here Lord,
just to moan and groan.
If only for a moment,
if You will Lord, let me see,
The answer to this question that I ask,
Dear Lord, why me?

© 1999, Jerry Ham

e-mail: Jerry.Ham@werner-saumweber.de

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